Dear Therapist: My Boyfriend’s Depression Is Making Me Question Our Future Together
By: Stephanie Kirby. Medically Reviewed By: Dawn Brown. Dating can be hard. Sometimes it’s difficult to find the right person, and it can also be challenging to make a relationship last through the ups and downs of life. If your partner also struggles with depression, it can make things even harder. Ask An Expert. When you’re dating someone with depression , you might feel at a loss. You might not know how to help your significant other, and you might also wonder if it’s you.
Dear Depressed Men: Please Stop Dating
But trying to navigate through the maze of emotions that is dating gets even harder — and can seem impossible — when you’re already grappling with a mental illness primarily affecting your emotions: depression. Because depression can severely affect a person’s ability to get up in the morning and live their lives, it can make dating — something that literally requires you to function pretty well — a little bit of a challenge to deal with. In honor of National Mental Health Awareness Month, Elite Daily spoke to a couple of experts about how dating can change when you have depression.
Obviously, dating is very much a social activity.
My friend is dating a guy who is and I’m just curious if anyone has dealt with this This is in no way a weird, judgmental thread so please be sensitive with posts.
In retrospect, this man was not a good match for me, but it was still a very painful experience, both because a serious relationship had ended and because I felt ashamed and thought that my depression had made me unlovable. Since this experience, I have learned a lot about my mental health and no longer feel ashamed of something beyond my control. With this self-knowledge, caring for my mental health has played a more positive role in all my other relationships.
I have been able to communicate effectively about my health to significant others and now to my husband. They may have crying spells, feelings of hopelessness, insomnia or over-sleeping, and changes in appetite. Here are a few things to keep in mind:.
Dating someone with clinical depression
Depression and anxiety are difficult — and, at times, debilitating — conditions. While everyone encounters obstacles throughout the course of their romances, they can put a heavy strain on your relationship. These mental illnesses may affect how your partner thinks, feels, and behaves. It can be incredibly painful to watch them struggle and hard to know how to help them cope.
For one thing, it is very likely that you will at least go on a date with someone who is suffering or has suffered from mental health problems. After all, 1 in
Depression can be devastating for those who suffer from it and dramatically impact their daily life. It also weighs heavily on those who love and support the person suffering. It can be hard to recognize signs of depression in those we love, and it can be even more challenging to confront these people with our concerns. However, depression should not prevent you from having a healthy relationship. Depression is a mental health condition associated with symptoms such as persistent sadness and loss of interest in previously joyful things.
People may experience these symptoms to different degrees, which can make this disorder hard to identify. To receive a diagnosis of depression, a person must experience these symptoms for two weeks or more. Unfortunately, for many who suffer from depression the symptoms can persist for years. Depression is thought to potentially be caused by a few different factors.
Tips for Dating While Fighting Depression
This is something that we should definitely be talking about. For one thing, it is very likely that you will at least go on a date with someone who is suffering or has suffered from mental health problems. Here are some things to think about when it comes to getting into a relationship with someone with depression , anxiety , PTSD , ADHD or similar mental health conditions:.
Depression can enrich relationships if you address it head-on. Make the most of your amazing partner’s company, despite their depression.
It can be hard to see someone you love and care deeply for feeling so blue, and it can be especially hard to feel like nothing you can do will cheer them up. Of course you want to support your partner and surround them with love, care, and attention, but depending on the person, it might feel smothering and counterproductive, explains licensed psychotherapist Markesha Miller, PhD.
Whether that be through medication or therapy or a little of both. The biggest mistakes my friends made when trying to help me was thinking they could solve it. Fifteen-ish years of it, and they all tried and failed to singlehandedly fix it. The only thing that helps is knowing they are loved and supported no matter how many times they shut you out and hermit crab their days or weeks away. He puts up with me at my worst, and I love him dearly because of it. If he wants to be happy, he is.
If he wants to get off the couch and stop being a lump, he does that too. You will get angry. These are okay feelings to have. I slept for most of the day and gained 40 pounds. My husband is a saint. He stuck with me, encouraged me to get help, and was patient while they played around with my meds.
8 Tips for Dating Someone With Depression or Anxiety
By: Kevin Dooley. Dating someone with depression can be a lot to navigate. What can help?
By acknowledging your own needs and getting involved in their healing process, you can support both your partner and yourself as you embark.
Depression builds walls around people and between people. When someone you love has been dragged inside those walls, there can be a distance between you both that feels relentless. Not in the way you both want to be anyway. The symptoms of depression exist on a spectrum. Not everyone who has depression will have a formal diagnosis, so knowing what to watch out for can help to make sense of the changes you might notice. Depression looks like a withdrawal. It feels that way too. Depression sucks the life out of life.
When depression bites, everything becomes hard. Life starts to hurt. Those who are bitten stop looking forward to things. They stop engaging and they stop enjoying things, even the things they used to love. If people with depression could be happy, they would be. If they knew how to be any other way, they would be.
27 things you should know before you date someone with depression
What to know when dating someone with depression. Some points to keep in those who know someone with depression trust me something one. This person in therapy.
Depression is a thief. Don’t let it steal your heart, too.
A scan of the statistics reveals: 1 in 5 Americans will experience mental health struggles in their lifetime. Two things we can learn from conversations about dating a partner with depression:. All relationships face obstacles, some more than others. Dating someone with depression is no exception, and can even be more challenging. However, those with depression often have incredible capacities for empathy, understanding, and emotional insight, which enrich relationships.
Learn how others get through similar struggles , and make the most of your amazing partner, despite their depression. For those who have depression, the stigma surrounding their symptoms can dissuade them from dating in the first place. Depression takes arguments to a whole new level. For many with depression, sarcastic comments feel more threatening, and conflicts feel more like personal attacks.
Even a small argument can seem catastrophic to someone with depression. They may give up easily, believing your issues are unfixable, while you see an argument as a small bump on the road.